Sunday, August 07, 2005

Movie: Must Love Dogs

Diane Lane and John Cusack - what's not to love. Stupid story, but then stories of unlikely, near-miss, near-miss, total-miss, almost connected, near-miss, near-miss FINALLY I FOUND YOU romantic love just make me pretty effin irritated generally.

John Cusack is always one I keep in my hip pocket but my eyes were on Christopher Plummer, who is of the age that gets my attention. Rowwwwr.

I adore Diane Lane too, but while I'm irritated, what's up with all these roles of hers in movies where the plot is entirely dependent on the unbelievable. I don't mean the kind of disbelief you suspend for purposes of alien invasions or giant asteroids or islands with prehistoric zoos. I mean where you have to suspend disbelief just for these people to make it through the day. On what planet will a man sign his divorce papers, be taken to the cleaners, have no visible means of support from his sensitive art of building boats he never sells, proclaim he is romantically benched forever and then in the next breath tell his best friend all of the qualities of the woman he's looking for because he's in it for a lifetime? Geez, not even divorced women behave like that.

Same deal with Diane in Under the Tuscan Sun...gosh, how horrible to be alone, broke, desperate and without prospects, so that your only remaining choice is to....buy an Italian villa and eat grapes for the rest of your life. Or how about in The Perfect Storm - you know our girl Diane would really be all over George Clooney instead of Mark Wahlberg. Or how about in Unfaithful where she abandons Richard Gere for hot times in the sack with Olivier Martinez.

Well, okay, that one I get.

But really. Hollywood is already beginning to push Diane into the old-heifers club so she really needs to get a good movie soon or start taking hand-me-downs from Meryl Streep. But there are lots of laughs in this, the dogs are adorable, the little children are adorable, Diane Lane is adorable, John Cusack is adorable, Stockard Channing is adorable and Christopher Plummer is just a stone fox stud quoting Yeats and Browning. And it'll make you want to see Dr. Zhivago again.....and come to think of it, Diane Lane would have been a perfect Lara in her day.

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