For the last few years, each Saturday has been a conundrum for me... a huge backlog of chores and commitments, the lowest point of the energy drain after a 60 hour work week... and the prelude to Sunday as the last-chance catchup, grabbing some uninterrupted hours at work in prep for the coming week. I've been working 7 days a week for years. When my mom lived at home it was 7 days a week and close to 20 hours a day and still never being productive or effective enough.
Now I'm not sure what to do. Usually I wake up at 5 as I do each day, take care of whatever pups are staying with me, drink some coffee and wrap my poor brain around a crossword, all the while thinking I need to hurry, need to hurry because I need to spend some quality time (if not quantity time) with my mom. Today I just feel a bit blown by the crosswinds. It's only a small part of the week but feels like a big void of directionlessness now.
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Mom died last September, 8 and a half months ago. I'm still figuring out what to do with my Sundays. I can only trust that the void will find a direction soon.
Sending you hugs and understanding.
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