Monday, May 03, 2010

I don't know where to start

As a linear thinker it feels right to me to connect, even in an abbreviated way, some narrative thread of the epic that’s occurred. Cliff’s done it with Shakespeare after all.

But the highlights haven’t been high and they haven’t been light.

I could simply hail the boat from this point, so far downriver now, and begin to describe the change in the scenery.

But I am so changed too. I have become someone who can articulate about all kinds of feelings and thoughts, except the most important ones and particularly about my own pain. I am no longer a sharer in that sense. With anyone. I have no aspiration to be different. The planet is down to just a few inhabitants and the cave is really down to just me.

I am never going to be a FaceSpaceTwit, that much is certain.

But the tide is ebbing and I am being pulled with its shift. And, not surprisingly, all of it is under the influence of one dog. This weekend was the first time in 18 months that I allowed it to take me deeply into the undertow. It was a meaningful baptism.

So I am stirring the sand here a bit, feeling that something is meant to be said now but guarding all that is in me to say.

4 comments:

Southern Latitudes said...

Peg!!
You're back. You were missed! Stir all the sand you want.

Robin C (who now has 2 chihuahuas and no boxers)

Crowzma said...

You can count on it that the more I have to say, the less I blog. Say no more than comes out. You have readers. Love you.

Genny said...

Sometimes there are no words just emotions and thoughts. I'm so glad to see you're blogging again and so glad to hear from you. I've missed you too.

Angela said...

I too am so glad to see you "back." Though you never really left. You were always here in the hearts of your friends and we love hearing from you!

Pixie (our new Beagle girl) sends Pixie kisses and love! I am backtracking now to catch up on your most recent posts.

Write whatever you want, whenever you feel like it. We're here!